When I eat at home, I can’t help but wonder, what is it that makes us different what are the habits that makes us different from others. We, the Bangladeshis, as a nation, can come across as being weird (read that as interestingly funny). At least, I feel, the rest of the world thinks that way. I take much pride in being a Bangladeshi, however, I feel I need to explain why we can seem weird. To get things started, let me begin by sharing a practical joke with you.
Many years back, my father was posted in Mumbai, India for work. My cousin and his wife decided to visit him. On the first day, while exploring the megacity, they stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. My cousin did not have a good grasp of the language of Hindi. Mustering what he could, he said something to the waiter that translated in English as, “I want to EAT some water.” The waiter intently stared at him for a few seconds and then asked him, “Are you from Bangladesh?” My cousin, “why, yes. But how do you know?” “Because,” the waiter replied, “only people from Bangladesh EAT water. They don’t drink it.”
That’s right. We EAT everything. And that’s because there is no word to describe the act of drinking (or even smoking) in modern spoken Bangla. Therefore, we EAT water, EAT cigarettes, EAT air and often times we even EAT our own words. In short, EAT is what makes us Bengali. And that explains how an innocent woman from Bangladesh turned into such a big foodie.
In Bengali cuisine, you will find a wide variety of food, starting from mouthwatering munchies to decadent main courses to delicious desserts. I promise you will find it difficult to pick a favorite. However, it goes without saying, in my many travels, I have found this type of variety & foodie culture is present in many countries. But when it comes to Bengali serving and eating etiquettes, there are big differences between us and other cultures. Let’s see, how.
- Our hand is our forks & knives**-**
Yes, you read that right. Unlike other countries, we don’t use forks and knives to eat. Our hands is our utensil. It’s mandatory to wash both your hands before and after meals. Just the other day, an American friend of mine asked me , “do you eat EVERYTHING with hand?” I said, “yes, for all South-Asian cuisine we use our hand, except dishes like soups, pastas, or western themed meals where utensils are more appropriate. Wonder how we cut those meat pieces? Well, dexterous fingers are better than forks at plucking every last shred of meat off the bones.
- Right is always right, whereas left is wrong-
When you are eating with us, you must remember to use your right hand to eat, even if you are a lefty. It is considered bad manners to use left hand for eating as that hand is used for personal hygiene.
- Don’t expect any appetizer before your meal-
Because we don’t know what appetizer is. The munchies that you will find are to be eaten only at odd hours. The fritters, puff pastries, biscuits or even the chats will be served only with tea in the late afternoon and definitely not before lunch or dinner. We prefer to save our appetite for the actual meal. I still remember how my mother reacted when she saw me snacking right before the meal time. Sadly, I never told her, but I loved eating street foods, used to sneak in a few bites and ended up eating very less during meal time.
- There are no ‘courses’ in our cuisine, except dessert-
Everything is served together on the table. Soup and salad can be eaten together with rice, along with the main course. Don’t be surprised if you see someone is eating soup with rice, on a plate, instead of in a bowl. And our version of soup that we eat is lentils (also known as daal). And the only ‘course’ that is served after the meal is dessert.
- We are a nation of RICE LOVERS -
Rice keeps us going. For many families, rice is even served for breakfast. In some mornings, if the lady of the house feels lazy, she serves leftover rice from the previous night, perfectly tossed or sautéed with a little oil and fried onion. We call that bhat-bhaji. I don’t know if there is any breakfast in the world as delicious as bhat-bhaji. Our lunch or dinner can’t be compensated with any other staple but rice. We don’t ask our mother, what’s for lunch or dinner. Instead, we ask, what are we eating with rice today.
- Drinking means non-alcoholic always -
With alcohol being a big-NO in our culture, you are allowed to drink water (or non-alcoholic beverages) before or during meals. You might be served tea, on request, only after you finish your meal. Or lemonade will be served before meal, on a hot day, made of freshly squeezed fragrant Bangladeshi limes. If a Bangladeshi asks for alcohol in my country, he will be labeled as a ‘bad guy’. However, if a non-Bangladeshi does the same, s/he will be refused very politely. A friend of mine in Bangladesh was visited by her Scandinavian friend during the fasting month of Ramadan. As a thank you present he brought with him a beautifully wrapped bottle of wine. My friend’s father thought that to be extremely disrespectful and was furious. Fortunately, my friend managed to explain the cultural differences & expectations to both her visiting foreign friend and her father and both sides mutually understood.
In conclusion, despite being such weirdos, we are people with warm and embracing hearts. We respect others’ opinions about our food. And we love it when we see our food is appreciated. Let me tell you one secret before I go, if you want to make a cook happy in Bangladesh, just always finish the food on your plate, then lick your fingers and burp. It’s a sign that proves that you enjoyed your meal extremely. Burping is not considered bad manners in my country IF you do it right after your meal. Yes, we truly believe that the best way to a person’s heart is through their stomach.
Happy eating! ?
to eat, before he came up with the idea of using finger tips for a phone. That’s possible 
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