Have you ever been to an establishment where “review” apps raves about how “amazeballs” the place is? Then you visit only to be disappointed. I’ve heard of stories where the “reviewers” demand something of the establishment in order to leave a good review. I remember a local sushi joint in Hawaii advertising "the best sushi on the island "and this app I used to trust rated it a near perfect score. I go there and the sushi rolls were horrible and seemed like the only sauces they used was sweet thai chilli sauce. NEVER AGAIN WILL I TRUST THIS APP.
As a local guide (like you guys) I’m going to be as honest as I can. I hoped that the many views of my reviews have established a trust between me and the everyday person and for the businesses possible satisfied customers. Am I a Gordon Ramse “F*** this is not F*** tofu chicken” or Guy Fierri “going down on flavour town”? No, I’m just a guy who loves good food, drinks and to see the amazing sights of my home town, cities and countries I frequent every year. I’m going to do this using my “amazing super duper mediocre but not very witty” wits. Armed with my sarcastically toned limited pop cultured brain I will try to make the reviews as entertaining as informative. Am I going to start reviewing the restaurant as well as it’s washrooms? NO course not, I’d get in trouble if I went into the woman’s bathroom.
I’m going review every place with best of my stupid abilities and hope to share something new with the reader. Am I gonna tell raw it like it is? No, I mean every place has it’s ups and downs and we human beings should be as empathetic as possible (otherwise we be no better than those damn seagulls…always gimme your food, ah never mind I’ll just take it from you) however if there are issues that can affect someones health (or wallet) damn right I will tell it like it is.
Why do I do this? Hahahahaha its definitely not so I can get picked to Connect Live 2019…hahahaha…haha…ha…
Ok maybe I do want to go to this stupid conference because I want to share and engulf myself with the knowledge of cool people (it’s not because I’m a stay at home dad who is always involved with his kids and their friends… always surrounded by kids…OH GOD I NEED ADULTS IN MY LIFE…PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD…ahem). Meeting new people armed with life knowledge about their cities and countries would be an amazing learning experience so I can set new travel goals to do that thing which will truly teach me about another culture…go eat.